Writing your own vows is a beautiful thing and truly makes your special day just that. That being said, there are definitely some do’s and don’ts to consider before committing to this idea.
Don’t...
- Feel like you have to write personal vows - Remember that you are getting up and sharing your love with hundreds of people and this can be a very overwhelming situation (even to the most outgoing and extraverted people). It is okay to stick to something comfortable. This could be words that you wrote together or that were provided by your officiant. Your day will be personal enough, even if you do not write your own vows.
- Add too many “inside jokes” - Of course, you want your vows to be special and all about the two of you, but remember that you are sharing them in front of many. This is a special moment you are sharing and it is important that your guests understand what is going on. Now, that is not to say there should be no inside jokes or personalization whatsoever, but it is important to at least consider this.
- Write your vows the day of - To many, including myself, they are the most important part of your wedding day so they deserve more than just a rush job the day of. Yes, writing them the day of puts you in a great state of mind, but if you are committing to marriage, you should be in a great state of mind regardless. They should be given the time they deserve. Why not write them a couple of weeks earlier and edit them the day before while you are practicing them? Because practice is a must!
Do...
- Share them prior to your wedding day - Whether this is a special moment you set aside the night before your wedding, or if you have a close friend who knows you both read through them. It is nice if yours and your fiance’s vows flow together, particularly in length. It could be quite uncomfortable if one writes three sentences and the other writes two pages.
- Practice them - You will be so full of emotions the day of your wedding no matter how strong you think you are, trust me! (My husband choked up during his vows and he is the last person I expected it from). When your significant other is out of the house, read them outloud to yourself or ask your maid of honor to listen to you. You can do this just a couple of times, but it will make a huge difference.
- Give an extra copy to someone you trust - If you have a wedding planner (like Alanna or I), they are the perfect person to hold on to your special words. One of your parents, a bridesmaid, a close friend, or an aunt or uncle are also all great options. There will be so much going through your head on this day and holding on to of a piece of paper may not be first on your list (not to mention, ladies, you have no pockets!).
Until next time!
Love always,
Everly and Grace
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